This is one of those posts that I agonize about writing, because I know it’s bound to rile people up and possibly make some of you dislike me, at least a little bit. This one’s particularly hard, too, because it’s going to directly challenge something that a great number of people I HIGHLY like and respect believe in, advocate, and do in their own homes. But I have to say it. I’m just being honest, here:
I don’t like the Switch Witch.
Ditto for the “Great Pumpkin,” “Tooth Fairy,” or whatever other euphemism you might have heard for this Halloween phenomenon. It’s gained great popularity in recent years, and many, many of my dear friends in the blogging community – not to mention a large number of you, my readers! – have embraced it wholeheartedly. To all of you I say, I’m sorry that I can’t get behind your witch. I love you dearly and encourage you, as always, to keep doing what works best for you in your own homes. There are as many ways to feed kids and manage the junk overload as there are stars in the sky. There are as many “right” answers as there are families. If you love the witch and you do the witch and your kids think the witch is the best part of Halloween and you want to kick me in the shins and tell me to go away, I understand. Enjoy your witch if that’s your thing.
But I’ve been asked about this a lot lately. So I feel duty-bound to explain why it’s NOT my thing.
Give me all your candy.
I don’t do the Switch Witch in my home because, in my view:
- The Switch Witch elevates the value of the candy. That’s right – to my way of thinking, at least, the very thing that removes the candy from the equation makes the candy inherently more valuable. Why? Because in order to make taking the candy away from your kids a fun, special, and passable enough solution that they will look forward to it each year, you’ve got to have the Switch Witch leave something reasonably desirable. So when the Witch leaves a Lego set, a much-desired video game, or those fun art supplies your kid really likes, what you’ve implied is that the candy is SO valuable that it equals the value of those items. The candy in this situation is like GOLD. It’s candy-as-currency, and I’m not comfortable with giving candy that much power. I’d rather that the kids enjoy a few pieces and forget about it as it grows stale in the drawer – which is the natural devaluing of the candy that takes place as the kids disregard it and realize anew each year that they don’t actually need candy in their daily lives.
- The Switch Witch can feel like “Us vs. Them.” All I have to do is think of L.’s school to know that this is a possible side effect of the witch. We live in a neighborhood that’s squarely positioned between “generally quite well-off” and “not at all well-off.” L.’s school has students from various cultural and socio-economic backgrounds. There are kids at that school whose parents can afford to do the Switch Witch, and kids whose parents can’t. What message does the witch send to those kids? That the other kids are good enough to get awesome toys from the Switch Witch, but they’re not? They all dressed up and went trick-or-treating together. Why is the candy “good enough” for some kids but not “good enough” for the others?
- The Switch Witch undermines learning how to navigate a junk-food world on your own. If we’re realistic about this, we know that our kids will eventually have to make decisions about WHETHER to eat the junk food they’re offered, HOW MUCH of it to eat, and what their alternatives might be – without our help or input. Halloween is actually a perfect teachable moment if you look at it in this context; but the Switch Witch doesn’t help much with this eventual learning, in my view. What she does is put a temporary band-aid on the problem; she makes opting out more appealing. But what happens later on, in a non-Halloween context, with no Mom or Dad there to employ a Switch Witch or another trade-off? How do kids who have little to no experience with managing junk food excess when it’s offered to them negotiate a big onslaught? Some binge. Some get unnecessarily anxious. Some do just fine. There’s no way to know how your kid will respond, of course, but one thing is certain: There won’t always be a Switch Witch around to decide for them.
Does any of this mean that I think we should let our kids just go hog-wild on Halloween candy with no moderation or oversight? Not at all. There are simple strategies you can employ to keep the candy excess in check – among them, keeping the trick-or-treat route on the shorter side, encouraging kids to sort their candy and execute trades between themselves until they have a culled stash of only the things they really want, and limiting the consumption of the candy they’ve collected to only those occasions on which you would have allowed a sweet treat, anyway. But for kids to learn how to manage that candy and keep it in its proper perspective, I think they’ve got to experience it. Not have it replaced with something better, not collect it and use it as currency, not feel externally rewarded for giving it up. Just experience it, and move on from it. Be gone, Switch Witch. You have no power here.
I agree. As parents, I am often faced with opportunities to let my children learn self control an healthy habits on their own. Halloween is one of them. On Halloween night, after I have checked their candy, they may have some. At snack time, they can have a little. After a couple of days, we end up with a huge supply of candy nobody wants. By Christmas I have thrown it out, an they don’t notice.
So, I have shortened trick or treat routes. One of the exciting things about Halloween is staying up late, so we come home and watch a movie. In past years, we have had a small gathering at our home I encourage less trick or treat time.
If you are going to just trade their candy for toys, why go trick or treating? Dress up and dance together, bake together, etc…
I love the idea of staying up late and having gatherings to make trick-or-treating less of the “main event!” That’s great thinking. I agree with you in the fundamental sense that if you’re not going to keep the candy, you may as well not trick-or-treat, and that would be fine. I think for many parents, the struggle is that they don’t want to say no altogether to trick-or-treating, because it’s something everybody else will be enjoying on that night — so the Switch Witch and other diversions come in to make it more palatable to the grownups.
I’m not riled up and still like you as much as before I found out you don’t like the Switch Witch. I’ve used the tooth fairy trade and found it actually devalued the candy for my kids. Instead of getting attached to a giant bag of candy, when they choose to exchange it for something better, the candy has a less important place in their lives.
As far as the “Us” vs. “Them” issue, I don’t think the candy is “good enough” for some kids but not “good enough” for others. It’s actually worse for children who suffer from food insecurity, a lack of healthy food and a lack of healthcare. I try my best to help solve those bigger picture issues but I’m not going to let my children be overloaded with sugar in order to even out the socioeconomic inequalities.
As for learning how to navigate a junk-food world on their own, one of my big concerns is the addictive nature of these things. If they get hooked at a young age, it becomes nearly impossible to navigate the junk-food world as an adult. One of the ways I manage as an adult is to stay away from the junk food and choose better options for myself. Adults have more control over those better options and I feel it is my duty as a parent to help provide better options for my children until they can provide them for themselves.
The most important thing is being mindful about the role sweets and treats play in our children’s lives. You and I may come to different conclusions but we’ve thought about what best for our children instead of just blindly following culture and tradition.
Thanks for your thoughts, Casey! 🙂 That’s why I say there are as many ways to do this as there are families.
“…one of my big concerns is the addictive nature of these things. If they get hooked at a young age, it becomes nearly impossible to navigate the junk-food world as an adult… I feel it is my duty as a parent to help provide better options for my children until they can provide them for themselves.”
Yes! I totally agree with this.
I agree with that as well! However, I think context matters. Many kids are not going to become addicted to Halloween candy or junk food if they eat a few pieces on Halloween night and one piece as a treat occasionally over the course of the week or so that follows. It’s the addictive properties of a steady stream of these types of processed, sugary, fried, and chemicalized foods that really concern me. I think it’s a tricky issue that, as with anything else, is household-specific. In our house, addictive types of foods aren’t generally offered. I don’t worry that a few tastes at Halloween will turn the kids into “junkies.” 🙂
I actually never heard of the Switch Witch! I must be living under a rock…or it’s simply because it’s not at all common in my circle of friends and family nor my culture. Coincidentally, I just watched ‘Charlie Brown: The Great Pumpkin’ for the first time today with my girls. Why is the pumpkin supposed to bring gifts?? The same goes for Easter. Easter bunny bringing gifts?? I will admit that I do put a small gift basket together, but mainly things that are very inexpensive/ trivial. In our family unit we don’t tell the kids it comes from the easter bunny. I understand certain traditions are hard to discontinue. We simply help guide our children to make better choices as they grow to be independent adults. For the time being we let our kids have the allowed sweets for Halloween–no switch-a-roo.
Well, let’s remember that “Charlie Brown” is from the 1960s. It’s really just a sweet story about a kid who got his holidays confused and is absolutely positive that the gift-giving comes on Halloween (note that he doesn’t believe in Santa Claus bringing gifts for Christmas!). 🙂 But now it’s become something that many families are using as a basis for creating this “Great Pumpkin” or “Switch Witch” character, so that they can have a fun holiday with their kids without junk food stress.
It’s interesting to hear your perspective on these things, culturally!
Both sides make great points! While I don’t use the switch witch myself, I offer it as a one solution because at Halloween the junk to healthier alternatives ratio becomes so skewed! Unfortunately for most kids, long before their first halloween haul, candy has become highly valued!
I agree, definitely (try to) teach moderation at Halloween, but this is best taught during more normal times (with respect to candy, that is)!
Jennifer A. Gardner, MD, FAAP, Founder, Healthy Kids Company
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Thanks for dropping by and commenting! Yes, I think there’s no one right answer, and Halloween is surely a higher-stakes issue if the day-to-day is full of sugary junk, as is the reality for many kids.
Bravo to you for sharing your thoughts so honestly! The fact that you expressed your concern about the reactions of those in the community underscores exactly what I just wrote about yesterday on my own blog: there is so much pressure on parents (never mind those of us in the “food” world!) to do the “right” thing when it comes to Halloween. We all need to step back from judging each other and recognize that what works for each family is very personal. The most important thing is to be clear about why you’re choosing your approach, and to communicate that to your kids. There are many teachable moments around Halloween. Even better, involve the kids in the decision of how you’re going to handle things. This can go a long way towards empowering them to navigate bigger challenges in the future (like how to manage alcohol at University!)
My kids are older, so the Switch Witch wasn’t even invented when trick-or-treating was part of our lives. But I’d have to agree with you that she probably wouldn’t have made an appearance at our house either. I always let my kids eat their fill of the junk, as long as they were eating their regular meals, and the thrill always wore off in a surprisingly short time. We then always donated the excess to a local homeless shelter.
I do believe there’s value in having the chance to eat as much candy as you like, once in a while. Doing so can drop the emotional power of the junk, and make it easier to manage in the long run. I believed that my kids needed to learn first hand how occasional treats could fit into a healthy, balanced diet. There shouldn’t be any guilt around indulging once in a while.
As I said in my post yesterday, this holiday is supposed to be about fun! Everyone needs figure out what works for them and just enjoy it.
Here’s the link to my post:
http://www.rainbowplate.com/dont-let-halloween-scare-you-how-to-make-the-holiday-a-happy-one-for-parents-too/
Thanks for your well-considered remarks! I agree that in our home, it seems that the kids “get over” the thrill much more quickly if I don’t try to manage or bargain about the candy at all. And they are starting to be able to articulate to me that for the most part, Halloween candies don’t give them as much satisfaction as their favorite high-quality chocolates or homemade treats. That’s the kind of self-awareness I want them to have.
I love your post. Great tips — thanks for sharing!
This is the first I’ve heard of the Switch Witch. I will confess that my first thought was “Transgender witches?” and my second impulse was to gird my loins for battle against the misuse of the term “warlock” for a male witch. You don’t want to know what the third and fourth thoughts were. Trust me on this.
HA! Now I really DO want to know!
[…] everyone agrees with this approach and fellow blogger Brianne DeRosa of Red, Round or Green revealed why she’s not a fan. Her reasons […]
I haven’t been able to articulate why I don’t like the concept, but you did it perfectly. I couldn’t agree more. In our house, it quickly shifts to out of sight, out of mind.
Thanks, Amy! Same thing in our house. Eat it, enjoy it, forget about it!
[…] Similar to a dentist’s buy-back, many parents offer their kids a present in exchange for the candy, and the magical agent behind this transaction is the “Switch Witch.” Given the growing popularity of the Switch Witch, I applauded Bri of Red, Round or Green for daring to say on her blog’s Facebook page that she’s not a fan of the custom. You can read her interesting reader exchange here. [Ed update: Oops! I didn't realize Bri had a whole post on this topic. It's great, and you can read it here.] […]
I think a very important part of the Switch Witch is this one: “After trick-or-treating, Pick out some things to keep…” I think this helps kids to figure out what they really want and what they could live without.
I have been debating whether to do this (down to the last minute!) and am still undecided. I think you make some very good points. My problem is that the times that I have tried to let my daughter “get her fill” she has literally eaten so much candy that she vomits. The last time I tried was Easter. She was so sick, but then the next day she was asking for candy again. Another issue is that I notice a HUGE difference in her behavior when she eats candy, particularly those with artificial dyes and flavors.
I think a compromise (for me at least, this year) will be to offer this to her. She could keep all the candy or take a chance with the Witch. Whatever I do, I’m sure I will continue to doubt myself!!
This is a great, well-considered comment, and it sounds like in your case, the witch really is something that might work very well in your home! As with almost everything in life, there are no absolutes. If your daughter hasn’t got the ability at this time in her life to regulate well enough for your liking, then the witch may help with that process. And I know what it’s like to have a kid who reacts negatively to artificial dyes and flavors! We are entirely dye-free for one child. Our method at Halloween is to have “safe” candy on hand to swap with him (and he and his brother execute some good trades — big brother gets the Nerds and Smarties and so forth, little brother gets some of the safe chocolate-based treats). Then he gets the same free rein over his stash as his brother gets. So far we don’t have binge candy kids, but that’s our good fortune. You do what you think is best, and don’t doubt yourself, because you’re thinking this through and doing what you feel is best right now with the information you have.
I let my 2 & 4 year old “go for it” when we get home from trick or treating, and then the next day we did a “candy tasting”… I took one piece of each type of candy we collected and let them each try a bite. Surprisingly, there were lots that they didn’t like (like, spit it out into a napkin didn’t like!)… so the rest of those ones we put in the “donate” pile (or into mummy & daddy’s pile if it was one we particularly liked!). The ones they did like, we added to the candy drawer. (we donated the rest to Operation Gratitude, who send it to the troops). I told them they are allowed one treat a day, and they can either choose a few pieces of candy as their treat, or something different (cookie, cake, sweet yogurt, dessert, etc), and they can choose when to have it, except that it has to be at a normal eating time (so either in place of morning or afternoon snack, or as “dessert” after a meal), and our usual “no foods two days in a row” rule still applied. I showed my 4 year old where the candy drawer was, and told him I trusted him to keep to the rules, but if he helped himself to candy during non-eating times, or had more than one treat a day, then I’d have to take the candy away. For the first week, he was asking for his treat for morning snack each day, and wanting candy each day (but accepting mini cookie packs instead when I reminded him that he had candy yesterday). Now, after 2 weeks, I think he’s forgotten all about the candy drawer, and hardly even asks for his “treat for the day”.
(Oh, and I also prepped him for all of this BEFORE Halloween…. that we needed to restrict our treats a little the week before halloween because we’d be eating lots of candy that night; that we’d be tasting all our candy to see which ones we liked best; that we’d donate the stuff we didn’t like to the troops, because different people like different things and they might like the ones we don’t; and that after that we’d work the candy into our regular eating times). I think the prep, and telling him why we were doing things really helped him to get it.
We don’t do the switch witch either (I also despise the elf on the shelf but that’s a different conversation). We let our kids enjoy the night, enjoy the candy, then the next day we make up little ziploc bags that each child puts a few of the favorites in to have as special treats over the next couple of weeks, the remainder gets shipped off to soldiers (a few dentist offices help with this, last year I sent it off to a friend of a friend over seas).
[…] everyone is a fan of the Switch Witch (read Red, Round or Green’s take in this post, “Switching Off“). But I like that this fun tradition teaches them to value what they like best–but […]
[…] the Switch Witch come by your house and leave a present in exchange for the candy? (Or do you dislike the idea of the Switch Witch?) Do you take the candy to the dentist’s office as part of a […]
[…] know not everyone is a fan of the Switch Witch (read Red, Round or Green’s take in this post, “Switching Off“). But I like that this fun tradition teaches them to value what they like best–but not waste […]